Summer Begins...
I'm stuck here pondering just how beautiful the Pitt-Jolie baby will be. Will I actually weep when I see pictures of it? Will an undying light emerge from Namibia, when the head crowns Angelina's nether regions? Do I even know where Namibia is? I'm sure the answer will come soon. I actually can't believe that the tabloids haven't colluded and built a geo-stationary satellite that can detect contractions.
Its been an interesting week, that old guy won American Idol, with apparently more votes than any president has ever received in any election. Granted you can vote more than once in the American Idol contest, but really isn't there something wrong with this picture? How 200 million people can be transfixed by people doing karaoke astonishes me. Its not even particularly good karaoke. That damn Mariah Carey made uvulating an R and B staple, now every tone deaf hack thinks that these bird calls make their singing better.
I lost 30 dollars playing poker on Tuesday. In an effort to be more manly and do more macho things, a couple of my friends and I are getting together once a month to play poker. Yes, we are way behind the curve, poker was so 2004, but whatever it's a good excuse to drink beer and eat fried food during the week. I think I should be a good poker player, there is a math aspect to the game, its half way intellectual. However, you really play the player not the cards, and my hatred for other naked apes impairs my poker ability. It's the same reason I can't work in sales, I don't pick up on subtle cues, I'm not particularly devious. Perhaps these things can be learned, and if we can teach monkeys to smoke and act in Clint Eastwood films, then there is probably hope for me.
I had an eye exam today; that was exciting. I must have been poked in the eye or something as a child, because I'm very sensitive about my eyes. I relocated my own shoulder one time without issue, but ask me to put in eye drops and it becomes a process. Apparently my eyes are getting weaker, figures. You can stop the old jokes now, its not funny and I know who you are so you might want to not provoke me this close to the 30th anniversary of my birth. Everything else seems good, apparently the windows to my soul are clean, just not very strong. I was a little worried after they dilated my eyes, apparently the doctor didn't think it was bright enough outside to be a problem. I'm not really sure how I got to work safely, I think my pupils were so wide that I could see the future, so I guess I could just anticipate the oncoming traffic. Unfortunately the drops wore off before I could go buy lottery tickets, but this is my life I don't know why I expect anything good to happen. Apparently in another life my I must have skewed my Karma a tad, you know like I was Darth Vader or the guy that invented the colonoscopy.
That's about all, I'll be spending my long weekend disguised as a wage slave, I'm so utterly happy about that, that I'm splurging and dousing myself with premium gas. Whatever I guess I can use the money or some such thing, its not really worth it at all, and chances are I'm going to flip out and kill somebody but at least the patrons will have some amusement. Summer is here though so that means good times are on the way.
More later,
J
Its been an interesting week, that old guy won American Idol, with apparently more votes than any president has ever received in any election. Granted you can vote more than once in the American Idol contest, but really isn't there something wrong with this picture? How 200 million people can be transfixed by people doing karaoke astonishes me. Its not even particularly good karaoke. That damn Mariah Carey made uvulating an R and B staple, now every tone deaf hack thinks that these bird calls make their singing better.
I lost 30 dollars playing poker on Tuesday. In an effort to be more manly and do more macho things, a couple of my friends and I are getting together once a month to play poker. Yes, we are way behind the curve, poker was so 2004, but whatever it's a good excuse to drink beer and eat fried food during the week. I think I should be a good poker player, there is a math aspect to the game, its half way intellectual. However, you really play the player not the cards, and my hatred for other naked apes impairs my poker ability. It's the same reason I can't work in sales, I don't pick up on subtle cues, I'm not particularly devious. Perhaps these things can be learned, and if we can teach monkeys to smoke and act in Clint Eastwood films, then there is probably hope for me.
I had an eye exam today; that was exciting. I must have been poked in the eye or something as a child, because I'm very sensitive about my eyes. I relocated my own shoulder one time without issue, but ask me to put in eye drops and it becomes a process. Apparently my eyes are getting weaker, figures. You can stop the old jokes now, its not funny and I know who you are so you might want to not provoke me this close to the 30th anniversary of my birth. Everything else seems good, apparently the windows to my soul are clean, just not very strong. I was a little worried after they dilated my eyes, apparently the doctor didn't think it was bright enough outside to be a problem. I'm not really sure how I got to work safely, I think my pupils were so wide that I could see the future, so I guess I could just anticipate the oncoming traffic. Unfortunately the drops wore off before I could go buy lottery tickets, but this is my life I don't know why I expect anything good to happen. Apparently in another life my I must have skewed my Karma a tad, you know like I was Darth Vader or the guy that invented the colonoscopy.
That's about all, I'll be spending my long weekend disguised as a wage slave, I'm so utterly happy about that, that I'm splurging and dousing myself with premium gas. Whatever I guess I can use the money or some such thing, its not really worth it at all, and chances are I'm going to flip out and kill somebody but at least the patrons will have some amusement. Summer is here though so that means good times are on the way.
More later,
J
posted by JD at 12:16 PM
1 Comments:
you got a funny way of looking at things. lol I had fun reading:) take care
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